Happy Birthday tooooo you!!!

Yes people my 18th birthday is riiiight around the corner...45 days to be exact.

I have had so many different ideas on what to do..

the first plan was to go to Oregon and go to Seaside with my mom, nick, and my brother for 3 days...then felt it was too expensive for my mom and started brainstorming again..then my gramma thought of canada! EH?!

haha/ And I do beleive that is still in consideration...but what is there to do in Canada anyways?... I mean I have never been out of the country so it sounded exciting at first but really what is there?! Besides a huge mall which I would not mind meeting;)

Then thought about just doing nothing:/

I just don't know!

And then I thought about the ocean again but then there were all those Tsunami warnings for the coast because of the earthquakes...and people...my ass cannot swim!! lolololol

Besides that I watched 2012 about a week after all these warnings and really...i don't need to be parinoid for my birthday right!? I can see myself leaving the hotel room at seaside in a life jacket and arm floaties...lmfao.

Danngg. I mean I even googled idea numerous times! Its crazy..

Any ideas? Please I have an open mind..just know drugs or drinking, because thats all people seem to do in this town for any occasion...get "fucked up, man!"...pfft. Lame.

Been there done that..don't wanna do it ever again..

Anyways!!!!!

Help me figure out my 18th!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wow!

I have been gone for so long.
Its already March 2010 and I havent been here since about september. Which was right after Nick and I lost our first child, a daughter; Leila Rene` Onisko.
I have since my last post I have been diagnosed with anxiety and depression. Which is extremely hard. It has been my everyday somtimes all day battle since I got the flu in early October. Keep me inyour prayers. I will probably battle this my whole life, but my faith in our Lord Jesus Christ is too big to give up. Yes I have my doubts when the anxiety kicks me a little harder than I'm used to but hey, if I dont have Christ what do I have?
The anxiety and depression that follows me around makes me feel like I'm in a dream, like things are artificial and unreal..I over think things way way way too much and that adds to the problem. But I'm gonna continue to fight til the day Jesus takes this problem away. I trust that it could be The Lord is letting this happen to me so I can become so much stronger for somthing else that will be harder..or so that I can help others with this same exact problem and lead them to our Saviour; Jesus Christ.

Also, some other things have happened since my last post...such as my boyfriend moving in to my family's home in the middle of october..possibly being pregnant again...losing my best friend..gaining her again..and again losing her for good..making plans to get married..fighing through online schooling..starting the process of finding my biological father..finding out my not biological but life long father has been sentenced to another 9 months in prison...going to GU 2010..getting new friends..losing a lot of old ones...becoming closer to Christ...two of my oldest friends Sara and Tyler havging their first baby, A son; Jayden..deciding to peirce my monroe...it goes on..but the four things that are ALWAYS ALWAYS constant in all of these equations...God, My family, Nick, and Learning from everything that happens.

Wow. I have a lot to tell you about. Keep watching...well, reading...I won't leave you for months again!

Brianananananananananananananaaaaaaaaaa

Currently Listening to Class....

September 14, 2009

I do online schooling.
Yea, it sounds pretty lame; but highschool is 70%Drama, 20%Stress, and 10%Work.
Doing Insight,my insight schools, is so much better and less stressful than "regular" highschool.
I hate school pretty much in general; but hey, you need a high school deploma to get a half decent job anymore.
And me wanting to go to culinary school, it would probably help having some basic skills, Right?
haha

Well, back to my plan: Cooking My way thru Julia Child's cookbook or Another fantastic Cookbook.
Obviously, I dont really have the time right now, so I think I will make myself out a schedual and start over my Christmas break.
Damn, do I ever LOVEEEE my Christmas break:]]]
Everything is just so happy, and just fkjasn;fwne Ahh:)
And plus, who doesn't love the receiving and giving?!
But, yes I am a Christian; Christmas is celebrated because it is JESUS CHRIST'S BIRTHDAY.

But if any of you are reading this, do you have any suggestions????
For my cooking?
Any cookbooks that you suggest?
Damn, that bacon smells good.
Well,
I suppose I should get back to work...Science is calling!!

And so the "Blogger" shall begin the Blog...

September 12, 2009

I cannot possibly explain the last seventeen years of my life in just one night[tonight], so as I write these blogs I will fill you in with the past, as it comes.
If you are familiar with the movie that just was released recently; Julie&Julia has inspired me to express myself more. Thus, I will now be an officail "Blogger".

To be a "Blogger"; must it be official?
Hmmm, ponder that. haha

ANYWAYS; along with the blogging, I have thought about cooking my way thru a cookbook of my choosing aswell, since I'v already been dreaming and aspiring to go to culinary school and making cooking my career(since its already a blossoming passion I have).
So, I hope to have many readers throughout this.

I need the support to keep me going.

:]
Brianaaaaaaaaa.